Most health platforms measure what happens to your body. This one tries to measure what's happening underneath it.
The pillar most health platforms don't measure. A 12-month inner record.
For most of my adult life, the relapses made sense. I’d get into shape, life would get full — parties, travel, people, things happening — and the discipline would relax into it. That was almost a good problem. It meant there was something worth relaxing into.
What’s different about the recent cycles is harder to explain. The disruptions aren’t coming from abundance anymore. Something is driving them that I haven’t fully located yet. People offer the familiar frameworks — unprocessed stuff, stress responses, anxiety — and the clichés ring true. But I’m better at intellectualizing them than actually sitting with them. I can build a platform that measures my cortisol. I find it harder to ask why it’s elevated.
I’ve never been someone who journals. My method has always been simpler: get back on the horse, work harder, earn the result. That worked for a long time. But the recent cycles — the ones where powering through stopped being enough — are making me question things I’ve been comfortable not examining. I tend to favor another workout over a difficult conversation. I’d rather optimize a system than sit with a feeling. This page is meant to put pressure on exactly that.
I’m not trying to return to who I was. I’m trying to figure out who I’m becoming — what I want, what makes me genuinely content, what kind of family member and friend I can actually be. This is the measurement I’ve been avoiding the longest. Probably the one that matters the most.
Tracking your own patterns? Want to compare notes on what you're finding? There's a place for that.
Join Average Joe Community →“The journal entries are harder to read than the lab results. That’s how you know they’re the important ones.”